What's going on in The Bamboo Village?

Yikes! I'm really terrible at this blogging thing! My goal was to make it a daily (or at least, weekly) thing, but it's becoming monthly. Perhaps I need to increase readership. That might be added motivation to keep up...not that I don't appreciate the 2 or 3 of you who check here religiously. ;)

Like most of you, I've been in a funk since the new year started. I was hopeful for the first week of 2009, especially since I was looking forward for my boss to return to work. However, I've since been deflated and just can't get the motor running!

My boss was supposed to return part-time at the beginning of January. She showed up a couple of times for a couple of hours. Then, last Monday, she broke the news to me that she would be taking the rest of the year off...as in "See you next January!" As the only full-time person working on this shipyard-wide program, I am now the "Program Manager". O.M.G.

I could be coasting down the high road of optimism right now. However, I'm a closet pessimist and have been experiencing some selfish emotions. Afterall, I changed jobs with the understanding that I would be working for my boss, learning and being mentored by her. Now what?

Don't get me wrong. I understand why she's made this decision. I probably would have done the same thing. I think the way this was handled/broken to me just made the blow that much worse. Understandably, she was ecstatic that her extended leave got approved, but she never really acknowledged the impact this would have on others. It was kind of like, "Hehehe, see you, suckers!"

I'm not the type of person who values fortune and fame. Others would probably see this as a springboard for career advancement. I don't see it that way. I don't have those aspirations at this point. In case anyone is wondering, no, this is not a promotion of any kind. Same position/title/pay. That's fine. I don't want to enter the realm of "management"...not officially, anyway.

Like my wise friend, Dior, told me. It's okay to feel grumpy and selfish about it, at least for a little while. :) I'm not going to be in denial about how I really feel about the situation, but at some point, I need to accept it and move on. I'm still grateful and thankful that I have a job. :)

Okay, enough about that. What else...we bought a new refrigerator and are expecting to need a new washer/dryer in the near future. Last December, our water heater died. This year, the refrigerator started making some very scary sounds when the compressor shut off. I was afraid that the compressor wouldn't turn back on. I think the new refrigerator arrived just in time (this past Saturday). This one's Energy Star rated, which was another good reason to replace our ~15 year old Kenmore.

We also went to Kauai over the holidays. Ugh. Still need to upload photos and post reviews! It feels like and overwhelming task!!! It was a nice getaway for me and Brian. I think we'll only need to go back to Kauai one more time since we didn't make it over to the west side. Long story short, I had motion-sickness for most of our travels. It was a nice change of scenery, but I was happy to return to the creature comforts of Oahu!

We are also seriously looking into refinancing. Our current mortgage is with American Savings Bank. In all honesty, we used them because the loan officer was a good friend of our realtor and we didn't know any better. This time, we're shopping around and, come to find out (as a result of my grandma's passing), my 2nd cousin works for a wholesale mortgage broker (808 Home Mortgage). My gut is telling me to go with 808 Home Mortgage. They've already given us more personal attention (perhaps because I'm "family") than ASB ever has. I think ASB is just too big, whereas 808 seems like a smaller operation. ASB just operates differently. I'm still not quite sure how their process works, whereas 808 has walked us through everything as if we were 4 years old, which we really appreciate. Oddly enough, though, I think ASB might be able to offer us a lower fixed interest rate. We'd be dummies to pass that up, even if their customer service isn't the best, right?

Since property values have plummeted, we're going to have to put down some substantial cash to refinance. 808 recommended putting 20% down to avoid paying private mortgage insurance (PMI) and to avoid any hassle due to the fact that our townhouse complex owner occupancy ratio is only 60% (most lenders require at least 70% owner occupancy for 80%+ financing). This could save us $1,000 per month, in addition to what we're already able save every month, even with our current mortgage. However, this would probably require us to drain our savings and borrow some money from my dad. Draining our savings is a super scary thought, but it could potentially save us paying $8,000+ in PMI over 5 years. Aaah, decisions, decisions....

Anyway, now I'm rambling. Dinner is calling my name...homemade chili...yummm....

Randomness

I feel so "blah" lately. I'm hoping it's just hormonal stuff.

I realized today that I have many amazing online friends. I've met a good number of them in person. It's funny, but some of my best friends are long distance. I miss them so much!!!

I'm watching "Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmerman" right now. He's in the Philippines, sampling all of their funky foods. He's a brave/insane man.

I'm still researching/finalizing plans for our Kauai trip. I'm so indecisive. I am a bit worried about all the rain the island has been experiencing. I saw the flooding and damage done by the storm last week and I heard another storm was supposed to hit them tonight. Oh well. What can you do?

I recently reconnected with the chapel coordinator from our wedding. She was in Japan for a while after our wedding, but recently returned to Oahu and is working with Best Bridal once again. She said that they would like to include some of our wedding photos on their revamped website! I'll let you all know what happens.

We bought some throw pillows to match our new couch. Need to post some photos of them later.

A sink full of dirty dishes is calling my name....

Been playing some video games

Brian started playing Lego Indiana Jones on the PlayStation 2. I thought it was so cute and fun-looking that he encouraged me to join him. We are hooked!!! It's fun because the characters go on missions together and there's a lot of problem solving involved. I like that it's not a competitive game.

We've also been playing Lego Star Wars II: The Original Trilogy and Brian just got Lego Batman. I hope we can try that one out tomorrow!

It's here, it's here!

Waiting...

Still no couch. Boo! Booooo!!!

New Job and New Couch!

I'm so behind. Gee, I've been saying that a lot lately. I've been putting my online life on hold. I'm just so worn out when I get home from work and would rather spend my usual online time with Brian before he leaves for the graveyard shift.

Work has been a toughie. I broke down in tears twice today...with a couple of trusted, close co-workers...not in front of any bosses or anything. I feel so overwhelmed, hopeless, confused, frustrated. I know I shouldn't take things personally, but I do. I'm a perfectionist, in a new position, suddenly the manager of a high visibility program in the shipyard. How did this happen?! I think people have unrealistic expectations about what I'm capable of doing at this point, being new and all. One day at a time. I'm hoping tomorrow will be better.

I've been staying at work later than I'd like. I'm kind of upset at myself for allowing it to get to that point. I told myself I'd never put work before family. My time with Brian before he leaves for work is precious. I need to stay true to my word.

Anyway, in light of us not being able to buy a house anytime soon, we opted for some retail therapy this past Saturday and bought this new sectional sofa for our living room.


We don't have it yet. It was supposed to arrive with a shipment on October 30th and still hadn't arrived by November 1st. It should be here any day now! After 4-1/2 years of living with hand-me-downs (which served us well, btw), I can't wait to relax in our townhouse with some "real" furniture!

I was told the color is "mocha". It's kind of tan, with what I interpret as a tinge of pink. But not too pink. When it arrives, I'll get a better photo of it.

Anyway, that's it for now. Need to shower and head off to bed. I think I need to get more sleep on a more consistent basis. I think my lack of sleep is affecting my ability to cope with things.

Tomorrow is another day. I'll be hitting the polls after work. Should be an interesting evening....

I'm so behind....

I've been in a bit of a rut lately. I've spent the last couple of weeks adjusting back to reality after having way too much food and fun in Las Vegas. My appetite was voracious upon our return. I think my stomach had expanded from stuffing myself at the buffets. I'm trying to get it to shrink back to normal. :P I still need to upload pics & video, too.

I haven't been very connected. I've fallen behind on e-mail, Knotting, and Facebook. I owe replies to so many people!!!

Right before we left for Vegas, my Dad decided to buy himself a funeral plan. Yipee! I ended up buying him an urn plot at Mililani Memorial Park. It's much cheaper than a regular-sized plot, but it's literally footsteps away from his parents. I'm happy that he'll be nearby when that time comes.

I've been having dreams about my Grandma. She appeared in a few of my dreams and it didn't seem odd. What was kind of odd was that she looked like how I remember her from maybe 10 years ago. Strange. I don't recall talking to her in my dreams. She was just kind of there.

Work has been great. Wow, never thought I'd hear myself say that. Sadly, though, my awesome boss will be going on maternity leave starting next Friday. I think I'm going to kind of be "in charge" since she's our Program Manager and I'm the only other full time person working on the program. She's shielded me from a lot of the political B.S. I feel like it's too soon for me to be thrown to the wolves. I've only been on the job for 2 months and I feel like I'm still kind of "recovering" from my last job. I still feel a bit fragile, I suppose. My boss is such a strong person with iron-clad ideals. I'm not sure I can fill her shoes. I'm not sure if anyone is expecting me to while she's gone for 3 months.

I'll leave you all with a corny tid-bit: Brian proposed to me exactly 3 years ago today. Yes, I remember the date. I don't think he does, though. :P And tomorrow is our 18-month-a-versary. :) Time sure is flying by....

That's all I've got for now. Need to start heading off to bed....

Interesting Days

It's been over a month since my Grandma's passing. We are still coping with the loss, but things are getting better. Yesterday, I visited her grave for the first time since the burial 3 weeks ago. I think I finally have the closure I was looking for.

It's been an interesting time for reflecting on my own life. To a certain extent, I've re-evaluated my priorities, relationships, and how I spend my energy. I've found that I can no longer expend effort maintaining relationships with certain people. For some, it is clear that I place a higher value on our relationship than they do. Given the extent of time I've known these people, it's been a tough pill to swallow.

Brian and I have also been planning for our final arrangements. It's a somewhat unpleasant, morbid topic to some, but after living through planning the final arrangements for my Grandma, I see the value in taking care of these things now.

To elaborate on what I mean, my Grandma bought a funeral plan for herself back in 1996 for just over $2,000. The exact same plan today would have cost my Grandpa nearly $10,000! That's probably $10,000 more than Grandpa would have been able to fork over. Yikes. Thank God Grandma had the foresight to plan ahead.

We sat down with Bernie Matsumura, a Family Service Counselor with the Mililani Memorial Park & Mortuary, to finalize the arrangements for Grandma's burial. Bernie really educated us on the ever-rising costs of final arrangements. I could see, first-hand, how much of a blessing planning ahead had been for Mom and Grandpa.

As a result, Brian and I (and my mom, too) have purchased funeral and burial plans for ourselves. I was shocked at how reasonable the monthly payments will be. We got a discount since we are still young. I'm glad that my survivors won't be burdened with the cost and decision-making associated with planning a funeral at such an emotionally-charged time.

We have also purchased 2 plots from a private seller. We were able to get both for about the same price we'd pay for 1 today if we had bought directly from the cemetery. And come to find out, the plots are just steps away from where most of the Kikuchis are buried, 1 row above where some of our Filipino relatives are buried, and across the road from where my Grandma and Great-Grandparents are buried. I think it was a sign.

I'm trying desperately to get my dad to start thinking about his final arrangements. Although he's a veteran, he doesn't realize that his only benefit is a burial at either Punchbowl or the Hawaii State Veterans Cemetery. He would still need to pay for a funeral plan for cremation, staff services, and the actual memorial service. At today's rates, the most basic funeral plan at Mililani Memorial is about $4500. I can't imagine how much that will be in the next 10-20 years.

To be quite honest, I would like my dad to be buried at Mililani with the rest of us. It will also make visiting much easier. As such, I'm thinking of convincing him to buy an urn plot, which is much small and cheaper than a full-sized plot. Bernie did some research for me yesterday and there is actually 1 urn plot available right next to his parents' gravesite. Yet another sign. The urn plot would cost my dad just $9/month.

I tried bringing up the subject of a funeral plan with him once already. He wasn't very open to the idea. He's the type that doesn't like to plan ahead. He keeps telling me there will be money in his IRA for me to pay for all this stuff when he passes. How does he know? How does he know it will be enough? I'm thinking Brian and I will have to pay some money, up front, out of our own pockets and then get reimbursed later. Most times, things like IRAs need to see the death certificate before they release funds and when they do release the funds, they are taxed. The difficult part is that Mililani's prices will be going up on September 14th so there is somewhat of a sense of urgency here. I'll keep working on him and keep you posted.

I have more things to update you all on: our upcoming trip to Las Vegas and my new point-and-shoot camera! Stay tuned....

Sad News

Grandma Ouchi suddenly and unexpectedly passed away yesterday. We are all in complete shock. Although she was diagnosed with breast cancer last July, she had successfully completed treatment and was given a clean bill of health. In fact, just last week, she had undergone some body scans to monitor her major organs. Everything was normal.

She was having dinner at home at around 6PM last night. My grandpa went outside to water the plants and when he came back in the house about 40 minutes later, he found her on the floor in the bathroom. We have no idea how long she was lying there.

My mom came home from work to find an ambulance, fire truck, and 2 police cars in front of the house. When grandma got to the ER, they worked on her for quite some time, but could not revive her. Grandpa described what happened at the house. I gather that she had already flat-lined in the bathroom. They think her heart just failed.

Grandma's 78th birthday is on Monday. They were all supposed to come over to my house tomorrow night for a birthday BBQ.

This is just one of those things. There really wasn't anything anyone could have done. Grandpa is not doing so well. I sense a lot of guilt in him. Plus, they've been married over 50 years. I can't imagine how he must feel.

The difficult part is that Grandma took care of all of the household financials. Grandpa and my mom need to figure out all that stuff...what bills they owed, what kind of accounts they have, etc.

I'm supposed to go over to the house today and help sort through stuff. I really don't want to. I'd like to just stay home and stay in bed. I have a headache and stuffy nose from all the crying. Brian had to go to work today. I wish he could have stayed home with me. I'll keep you all updated....

Some photos from our wedding:

What's Wrong with this Picture?

No joke, this photo had to be pulled from The Honolulu Advertiser website after people got a bit rowdy with their reader comments. It's a photo of people making sandwiches. Do you see what they got all excited about (no pun intended)?

Okay, okay...it's a knife handle! Such a bad angle....