Interesting Days

It's been over a month since my Grandma's passing. We are still coping with the loss, but things are getting better. Yesterday, I visited her grave for the first time since the burial 3 weeks ago. I think I finally have the closure I was looking for.

It's been an interesting time for reflecting on my own life. To a certain extent, I've re-evaluated my priorities, relationships, and how I spend my energy. I've found that I can no longer expend effort maintaining relationships with certain people. For some, it is clear that I place a higher value on our relationship than they do. Given the extent of time I've known these people, it's been a tough pill to swallow.

Brian and I have also been planning for our final arrangements. It's a somewhat unpleasant, morbid topic to some, but after living through planning the final arrangements for my Grandma, I see the value in taking care of these things now.

To elaborate on what I mean, my Grandma bought a funeral plan for herself back in 1996 for just over $2,000. The exact same plan today would have cost my Grandpa nearly $10,000! That's probably $10,000 more than Grandpa would have been able to fork over. Yikes. Thank God Grandma had the foresight to plan ahead.

We sat down with Bernie Matsumura, a Family Service Counselor with the Mililani Memorial Park & Mortuary, to finalize the arrangements for Grandma's burial. Bernie really educated us on the ever-rising costs of final arrangements. I could see, first-hand, how much of a blessing planning ahead had been for Mom and Grandpa.

As a result, Brian and I (and my mom, too) have purchased funeral and burial plans for ourselves. I was shocked at how reasonable the monthly payments will be. We got a discount since we are still young. I'm glad that my survivors won't be burdened with the cost and decision-making associated with planning a funeral at such an emotionally-charged time.

We have also purchased 2 plots from a private seller. We were able to get both for about the same price we'd pay for 1 today if we had bought directly from the cemetery. And come to find out, the plots are just steps away from where most of the Kikuchis are buried, 1 row above where some of our Filipino relatives are buried, and across the road from where my Grandma and Great-Grandparents are buried. I think it was a sign.

I'm trying desperately to get my dad to start thinking about his final arrangements. Although he's a veteran, he doesn't realize that his only benefit is a burial at either Punchbowl or the Hawaii State Veterans Cemetery. He would still need to pay for a funeral plan for cremation, staff services, and the actual memorial service. At today's rates, the most basic funeral plan at Mililani Memorial is about $4500. I can't imagine how much that will be in the next 10-20 years.

To be quite honest, I would like my dad to be buried at Mililani with the rest of us. It will also make visiting much easier. As such, I'm thinking of convincing him to buy an urn plot, which is much small and cheaper than a full-sized plot. Bernie did some research for me yesterday and there is actually 1 urn plot available right next to his parents' gravesite. Yet another sign. The urn plot would cost my dad just $9/month.

I tried bringing up the subject of a funeral plan with him once already. He wasn't very open to the idea. He's the type that doesn't like to plan ahead. He keeps telling me there will be money in his IRA for me to pay for all this stuff when he passes. How does he know? How does he know it will be enough? I'm thinking Brian and I will have to pay some money, up front, out of our own pockets and then get reimbursed later. Most times, things like IRAs need to see the death certificate before they release funds and when they do release the funds, they are taxed. The difficult part is that Mililani's prices will be going up on September 14th so there is somewhat of a sense of urgency here. I'll keep working on him and keep you posted.

I have more things to update you all on: our upcoming trip to Las Vegas and my new point-and-shoot camera! Stay tuned....

Sad News

Grandma Ouchi suddenly and unexpectedly passed away yesterday. We are all in complete shock. Although she was diagnosed with breast cancer last July, she had successfully completed treatment and was given a clean bill of health. In fact, just last week, she had undergone some body scans to monitor her major organs. Everything was normal.

She was having dinner at home at around 6PM last night. My grandpa went outside to water the plants and when he came back in the house about 40 minutes later, he found her on the floor in the bathroom. We have no idea how long she was lying there.

My mom came home from work to find an ambulance, fire truck, and 2 police cars in front of the house. When grandma got to the ER, they worked on her for quite some time, but could not revive her. Grandpa described what happened at the house. I gather that she had already flat-lined in the bathroom. They think her heart just failed.

Grandma's 78th birthday is on Monday. They were all supposed to come over to my house tomorrow night for a birthday BBQ.

This is just one of those things. There really wasn't anything anyone could have done. Grandpa is not doing so well. I sense a lot of guilt in him. Plus, they've been married over 50 years. I can't imagine how he must feel.

The difficult part is that Grandma took care of all of the household financials. Grandpa and my mom need to figure out all that stuff...what bills they owed, what kind of accounts they have, etc.

I'm supposed to go over to the house today and help sort through stuff. I really don't want to. I'd like to just stay home and stay in bed. I have a headache and stuffy nose from all the crying. Brian had to go to work today. I wish he could have stayed home with me. I'll keep you all updated....

Some photos from our wedding:

What's Wrong with this Picture?

No joke, this photo had to be pulled from The Honolulu Advertiser website after people got a bit rowdy with their reader comments. It's a photo of people making sandwiches. Do you see what they got all excited about (no pun intended)?

Okay, okay...it's a knife handle! Such a bad angle....

Handmade by Nicole | Dry Embossed Greeting Cards

I've finally uploaded more of my cards to a "secret" blog. I plan to keep adding designs as I make them. Click on the banner to see the site!


My buddy, and future attorney, Dior, suggested that I write to the company that makes the stencils I use. They explicitly state on their website that those who wish to use their stencils to make products for sale must obtain their written permission to do so.

I haven't "sold" anything yet. I make the cards as gifts and for my own personal use. But, you never know what may happen so I've been meaning to write to the company. I'll keep you all posted.

Wedding Photos

Here are some photos I took:

Local Hawaiian musician, Gaylord Glushenko, singing beautiful songs of love

The lovely bride, Wendy

The groom, Bobby, and his 2 sons approach

The ceremony

The Newlyweds with Diamond Head in the distance

Reception at The Willows

Jam session with Gaylord and Mike Barquez, another local Hawaiian musician

The gang. Brian's eyes are closed. :P
You can see more of the photos I took here.

Magic Island Wedding

We had an awesome weekend. It began on Saturday morning by attending an intimate, impromptu wedding of which we had less than 24 hours notice. As nothing was really planned, I ended up being the wedding photographer and Brian was the videographer. Geez, talk about pressure!!!

The wedding was no-frills, but very moving. We met some really wonderful, down-to-earth, sincere people today. Brian and I left the wedding feeling very refreshed, blessed and uplifted. Here are some shots of the gorgeous scenery that day. I'll post some wedding photos in another post.

I'm back!

Sorry it's been such a long time! Nearly 1 month...Yikes! Yes, we are alive and well. Things have been very busy. Thank you Kathy for giving me a little nudge. ;)

I have a new job!!!!!!!!! I start Monday. Much sunnier skies lie ahead. I'll keep you all updated on how it goes. It's still in the shipyard, just a different department.

I have some photos to share from the past few weekends. I'll blog about them separately....

I have so much to catch up on, but I'll blog about recent stuff first and then try to catch up on old stuff as I'm able to. Thanks for being so patient!

Big, Well-Balanced Breakfast Aids Weight Loss

An interesting article from the Washington Post. I didn't think a big, carb-heavy breakfast was scale-friendly.... I don't usually eat breakfast and if I do, it's normally just a little packet of instant oatmeal. I get up at 5AM and start work at 6:30AM. There's no time to eat before I leave for work. Looks like I should starting taking a more substantial breakfast to work with me.

Big, Well-Balanced Breakfast Aids Weight Loss

By Serena Gordon
HealthDay Reporter
Thursday, June 19, 2008; 12:00 AM

THURSDAY, June 19 (HealthDay News) -- Starting your day with a large meal packed with both carbohydrates and lean protein, and even a small piece of chocolate, can help lessen cravings and hunger the rest of the day, which can lead to significant weight loss, new research suggests.

Presented at this week's Endocrine Society annual meeting, in San Francisco, the new research found that sedentary, obese women lost almost five times as much weight on the "big breakfast" diet as did women following a traditional, restrictive low-carbohydrate diet.

"We treat obese people by telling them to eat less and exercise more, but that does not take into account feelings of carb cravings and hunger. We have to change our approach and find a diet that can control cravings and hunger," said the study's lead author, Dr. Daniela Jakubowicz, a clinical professor at Virginia Commonwealth University and an endocrinologist at the Hospital de Clinicas Caracas in Venezuela.

Jakubowicz explained that when you wake in the morning, your body is primed to look for food. Your metabolism is revved up, and levels of cortisol and adrenaline are at their highest. Your brain needs energy right away, and if you don't eat or you eat too little, the brain needs to find another fuel source. To do this, it activates an emergency system that pulls energy from muscle, destroying muscle tissue in the process. Then when you eat later, the body and brain are still in high-alert mode, so the body saves energy from the food as fat, she said.

Compounding the problem, your levels of the brain chemical serotonin are highest in the morning, which means your craving levels are at the lowest when you first wake up, and you may not feel much like eating, Jakubowicz said. But, as the day wears on, serotonin levels dip, and you get cravings for chocolate or cookies, and the like. If you eat these foods, your serotonin levels rise, and your body begins to associate good feelings with them, creating an addictive cycle, she said.

To combat both the addiction cycle and the hunger that inevitably seems to come with calorie reduction, Jakubowicz and her colleagues designed the "big breakfast" diet. In this eating plan, your breakfast accounts for roughly half of your daily calories, and breakfast includes milk, 3 ounces of lean meat, two slices of cheese, two whole grain servings, one fat serving and one ounce of milk chocolate or candy.

The high protein, carbohydrate mix gives the body the initial energy boost it needs in the morning. Throughout the rest of the day, the meals are made up of protein and complex carbohydrates, like vegetables. Because protein is digested slowly, Jakubowicz said, you won't feel hungry.

And, she said, by having a small piece of chocolate or candy when serotonin levels are high, it won't taste as good, and the brain won't feel the same serotonin boost, which will eventually help cut down on cravings.

In the study of 94 obese, sedentary women with metabolic syndrome, half were told to eat the big breakfast diet containing about 1,240 calories, while the other half ate a 1,085 calorie high-protein, low carbohydrate diet for eight months.

At the end of the eight months, those on the more restrictive low-carb diet lost an average of almost 9 pounds. But those on the big breakfast diet lost nearly40pounds. That translated to an average body mass loss of 4.5 percent for those on the low-carb diet and a 21.3 percent average loss for those on the big breakfast plan.

Additionally, those on the big breakfast plan reported feeling less hungry and had fewer carbohydrate cravings.

Nutritionist Geri Brewster, a wellness consultant at Northern Westchester Hospital Center in Mount Kisco, N.Y., said she already recommends a large, well-balanced breakfast to all of her clients, because it helps to keep blood sugar levels stable.

She said if you eat a traditional breakfast, something like cereal or a doughnut, your blood sugar and insulin levels spike. Once that blood sugar is used up, you'll still have excess insulin circulating, which makes you hungry and makes you crave carbohydrates.

A second study presented at the meeting reinforced the idea that biological changes occur when you carry excess weight, Brewster said. This study found that women who are overweight don't experience a drop in leptin levels after exercise like lean women do.

Leptin is a hormone that plays a role in appetite regulation and metabolism. Brewster said she wasn't surprised by these findings, because once the body is overweight, it tries to maintain that size. "Fat cells become mini-endocrine systems themselves to maintain obesity," she said, and keeping leptin levels elevated is likely one way the body does that.

More information

Learn more about weight loss from the U.S. National Women's Health Information Center.

SOURCES: Daniela Jakubowicz, M.D., clinical professor, Virginia Commonwealth University, and endocrinologist, Hospital de Clinicas Caracas, Venezuela; Geri Brewster, R.D., M.P.H., nutritionist and wellness consultant, Northern Westchester Hospital Center, Mount Kisco, N.Y.; June 17, 2008, presentations, The Endocrine Society annual meeting, San Francisco

Ruffles Potato Chips & Ketchup...

...are delicious together!!! Don't knock it 'til you try it. It tastes just like french fries!

I need a vacation...

...and during that vacation, all I'd do is sleep. I'm so tired and haven't been sleeping very well. I've been averaging about 4 hours of sleep per night. It's not good. I'm sure sleep deprivation must be shortening my life span. :P My older brother also has trouble sleeping sometimes. I wonder if it's genetic?